Face Fat

Parental Advisory - Adult content.  LOL
Now that I have that out of the way....  I have been wanting to share this for a while.  But you know, it may not be suitable to tell the people that really need to know it. 
Face Fat - this doesn't have to mean that you are all over fat.  There are some people that just hold onto the chubby cheeks for a while.  And there are some people that when they start to gain some weight, that is the first place that it starts to show.  I am one of them.  I have high cheek bones, so when my face gets a little chubby, it is pretty noticeable.  It was really bad the first time I got pregnant.  Pregnant face is one of the worst Fat Face scenarios, because it seems like every woman gets it.  But I will let you in on a few things to do to not get Fat Face, or to widdle away your chubby cheeks and double chin.   It boils down to using the muscles in your face and jaw. 
1) Smile.  Simple enough, huh?  Smile, laugh, chat.  Use those muscles to make your whole well-being better. 
2) Chew gum.  It keeps your mouth busy so that you aren't putting food in it, and it is working out your jaw which will help your whole face.  But unlike eating to work out your jaw, you are consuming a minimal amount of calories and your "workout" lasts longer than a 15 minute meal. 
3) Eat Ice!  Oh, I know that some dentists will read that and want to strangle me.  But my dad used to eat ice, and I just sort of started the habit too.  When I was in high school, that was how I beat the munchies.  And I was really bad too.  I wouldn't even put liquid in my cup of ice.  It drove people nuts! I did that through college and even the first couple of years we lived together.  eventually I stopped when we bought the house and it had air conditioning.  It gets really cold eating ice!  But then you aren't snacking but still getting a face workout. 
4) Give head.  Now, guys are going "Whoohoo.  I can use that to my advantage!"  But I am very serious.  Here me out.  When I was pregnant the first time, I felt sick almost the whole time.  I was still horny - big thing about pregnancy in your 2nd trimester.  So, we had sex a lot, but I didn't give head because I didn't want to gag and throw up.  But when I was pregnant with Aaron, I was on pelvic rest and we couldn't have sex for 4 months.  I couldn't just leave my husband high and dry, so I gave him head almost every night.  In turn, I really didn't have pregnant face the 2nd time around.  Now, I know that it isn't possible for every woman to do that all the time - you have to have a man around for that one.  But take advantage, and I am sure that your man will appreciate it and thank you in his own way. 
There you go.  Comment or post back if you have other ways of getting rid of face fat.  If you like your chubby cheeks, then feel free to ignore all of the advice in this column.  And if you just think I am crazy - Yep, I am.  Join the club - it's fantastic!  :)