The pink house

We put our house on the market today and James showed the listing to some of his coworkers.   We do have one of the biggest backyards in the neighborhood,  but everyone was amazed at just how big it looked in the pictures.   They said "you could fit a whole other house back there!"   So I said "yeah, the pink house for my gay boyfriend! "   James said "he can't live that close, I've been working out and he might want me instead!!!"   Love it!  He's not against my having one, just not with it....

Ginger

One of my favorite lines in Pitch Perfect is "this ginger needs her jiggle juice! "  It's funny, and I'm a ginger. So we were watching it earlier and that part came on, so I did the butt slap & snap that Chloe does in the movie.    Aaron was next to me on the couch and when I did it, he turned and slapped my thigh right where I did.  It was funny, so James told Aaron to do it harder. So he would slap my thigh and I would snap.  After a few, it was stinging. So James slapped the same spot (really hard), and told Dylan too as well.  WOW!  My thigh was bright pink and burned.  Apparently I can't do the "this ginger needs her jiggle juice" slap & snap any longer around my family.  Two hours later and that spot still hurts!

CO men

My company went through a Tx sales tax audit, which meant I had to go to the office everyday to help out the auditor.   He was cool, so it made it easier to have to be there - compared to the mental image of an auditor as an older, balding, greying, heavy-set man with no measurable sense of humor.  Anyway, we talked a lot while he was there, about food, football, denver, mountain time zone, weather, living the bachelor life, etc.  But the funniest conversation came on the last day as he was packing up to leave.   He lowered his voice and asked what was up with all CO men having really short haircuts.  My first thought was that I had never noticed.  But then I thought maybe it had to do with the fact that we are more laid back here, don't care as much what people think of us, and in the winter, it's easier to have a short haircut that won't get messed up by putting a snow cap on.  Now that he brought that up, I keep noticing men's haircuts all the time.  And for the most part, it's true!  Weird.....

Drama!

Our boys are total drama queens.   We know it, they know it.  So now when they are actively trying to create drama or whining, we say "DRAMA!"   We say it just like Mike Meyers in "The Love Guru."   The boys started calling each other drama queens in the backseat of the truck, and then decided they didn't like being called queens.  So now they have decided that being called "drama knights" sounds way cooler. 

Burrito

We were laying in bed this morning with Dobby laying between us.  I was petting him, and James was annoyed that he was between us.  So to mess with him, James started playing with his feet, which Dobby hates.  James kept saying that he looks like a burrito and we should roll him in foil next Halloween.  
So as I laid there laughing, James tried to teach Dobby to curl his legs into his chest and "burrito."   Haha.  He would be the only dog that can't "lay down" but can "burrito."   That would be an awesome trick.

Sexy vs Slutty

For my husbands birthday today, he asked me to put on "something slutty" after the kids went to bed.   Hmmmm.  Slutty?   I have way more sexy clothes than slutty clothes.  Clothes = lingerie.  As a wife, is it just me, or do you choose sexy over slutty?   But sometimes it's good to have both in your bag of tricks.

Weirdo

We were up in our bedroom and Dobby was laying on Draco's freshly washed "bed".   So I was talking to him about it being "so comfy!"   So I was talking to the dogs in a "Despicable Me" kind of way when it suddenly occurred to me that I sounded like Miss Kay from Duck Dynasty.  Wow!   So I turned to James and said "I worry about myself sometimes."  And James said "good that it's sometimes, because I worry about you all the time...."   yeah, I'm kind of a weirdo.

Talking with myself

I work from home, by myself, the majority of the time Mon - Fri.  One side effect of that isolation is that I tend to talk to myself, or my animals if they are around.  Most of the time it is just to try and get an idea solidified in my head, which speaking aloud does for me.  I think that I might have taken it a little too far today though.  I actually corrected myself, and then sort of had a disagreement with myself about the correction.  Hmmmm. 

Here's how it went....  I was thinking something to myself, and here's how the conversation went when I started speaking aloud. 

"You spoke too soon."
"No, you really didn't speak aloud, you just thought it."
"But, I think it works the same way, whether you speak aloud or just think it."
"Then you should have said You Thought too Soon."
"Does it really make that big of a difference?"

That's when I realized I was arguing with myself and that I should probably stop.  Then a scene from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets popped into my head about hearing voices....

"I'm not crazy...  My mom had me tested."  - Sheldon Cooper, The Big Bang Theory

Dat ass

The other night we were all wrestling around.  James gets the boys in an awkward position and then says "you wanna get down on this?".  Meaning "spank his butt!".   As we were wrestling, he hit my butt and Dylan said "spank her butt!"  And James whispered "I don't spank her butt, I smack dat ass!"  We laughed for hrs about it.